A guy walks into a dentist’s office and says, “I think I’m a moth.”
The dentist replies “You shouldn’t be here. You should be seeing a psychiatrist…”
The guys replies, “I am seeing a psychiatrist.”
The dentist says, “Well then what are you doing here?”
And the guy says, “Your light was on.”
A coffin maker was on his way to deliver one of his coffins one night when his car broke down.
Trying not to be late, he put the coffin on his head and began heading to his destination.
Some policemen saw him and wanted to make some easy money off him (bribe) so they challenged him
“Hey, what are you carrying and where are you going”?
The man replied (You will love the answer) . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
“I did not like where I was buried so I am relocating” . . . . . . . .??
The policemen Fainted..!??
A man was terribly overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet.
“I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you’ll have lost at least 5 pounds.”
When the man returned, he shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds.
“Wow, that’s amazing!” the doctor said, “Did you follow my instructions?”
The man nodded. “I’ll tell you, though, I thought I was going to drop dead that 3rd day.”
“From hunger, you mean?”
“No, from skipping.”